Bismillahirrahmanirrahim.

Assalamualaikum and hello for those who are reading. So, I have been doing great after being a blogger again. I know, this blog is new so not many people will stop by hahahah. But life must go on, people will eventually notice !

adulthood? who among u teenagers are ready to become an adult? pffft, me? nahhhhhh. Not yet. I feel like time flies so fast and I am not ready to leave my teenage years even tho some people say that this period of time is kind of dangerous because we are terdedah dengan pengaruuh sekeliling and stuffs like that.

well for me , I can actually take care of myself. no it's that I am capable in everything just yet but the fact that I am aware that I should not be doing something that'll hurt myself, mommy and anyone. Ever since daddy passed away, i kind of like take things more seriously. I was his favorite daughter you know. He was so proud of me whenever I got good grades and he would actually brag about how clever I was to his friends and family.

Before he passed away, I never really solat and pakai tudung. I was an athlete, I would wear shorts and singlets and you know showed off some skins. I took everything as a joke  that there would be  actually a tomorrow for me to clean up my mess and apologize to people i did wrong.

Then, he left. I loved him. His death sure made a huge impact on me. Alhamdullillah, I knew my responsibility as a daughter and I should not be continuing the mistakes I used to make. I did not know where, why and when I started to terbuka hati and actually perform Solat and tutup aurat. Orang kata, hidayah Allah boleh datang bila-bila masa and I am very thankful for the hidayah I received.

Bukan mahu kata yang diri ini cukup baik bagi menghuni syurgaNya, but I am trying, baby steps. Masih mencuba untuk kekal istiqamah dalam melakukan suruhanNya dan meninggalkan laranganNya. Sometimes, boleh terlepas cakap, mengumpat and tanpa sengaja menyakiti hati orang . Manusia biasa, I am not perfect.

I have so many problems and yet I do not know how and to who I should tell. Anyone wants to lend me a shoulder to cry on? Nahhh I'm kidding. It's just that, not everyone is going to understand the pressure that you're under. Hati tidak tenteram, mungkin kerana dosa yang dilakukan selama ini, Allah tarik nikmat tenteramnya hati.

But I do believe tho, one day, semuanya akan okay. Because at the end of the day, Allah will pay for all the deeds and kesabaran oleh hamba-hambaNya. InshaaAllah.

Sampai sini sahaja coretan dari hati daripada seorang anak yang merindui ayah. Assalamulaikum.